Progress vs. Perfection

If you’re a human being on this planet (99% chance you are), there's a good chance you have some positive (or negative) associations with the word "perfect"—who doesn't want to be perfect? But more importantly, is it possible? 

You may not realize how much you hold yourself back by striving for perfection, especially when it comes to setting and achieving goals. How many times have you sat down with a pen and paper, wrote down some goals and felt full to the brim with excitement and motivation. You may have thought, “this time is different, this time the motivation won’t waver”- only to be let down when the motivation does waver the minute obstacles start to come your way. If you’re feeling some shame and guilt after reading that, stop it. You’re not alone. I’ve been there too. But I have realized something myself (and yes, it took me being coached to realize this) that it isn’t your fault. It’s not, trust me. Discipline or lack of discipline is not the problem. Instead, it may be the WAY you are setting your goals that is setting you up for feeling guilty and shameful upon not completing them as quickly as you expected. 

There is nothing wrong with shooting for the stars, but these perfect goals tend to not carve out room for shortcomings. Goals are intended to be something to reach for, not something you know for sure you will achieve; otherwise it wouldn’t be a goal, right? I’m sorry if this is going to ruin your day, but falling short or not meeting specific expectations you set for yourself is pretty much unavoidable in the pursuit of success. If we win every time, then when do we learn?

Shortcoming may look like many things to different people, it can be not waking up when your first alarm goes off in the morning, saying ‘yes’ to the free donuts at work (who wouldn’t?!), missing a workout, or literally failing a test. You get the point, it all feels horrible when those instances of ‘disappointment’ appear in your life and make you want to abandon your goal or goals all together. I agree, it is a tough emotion but what if instead of thinking of that one instance as the end-all, think of it as just a step back (and maybe not in a bad way). Look at it as a chance for redirection, to get you on the right path to achieve your goals. Or maybe think of it as a blessing. Perhaps you were late for work today because there was an accident earlier in the morning that you avoided because you were late. 

To see goals reached successfully, it’s important to focus on three actions: concentration, effort, and persistence.

Concentration:

Goals can give you structure, focus and clarity. When it comes to setting yourself up for success, the benefit of creating a detailed plan can not be underestimated. Increasing the detail can significantly reduce action, hesitation, and procrastination (a #1 goal killer). This is where 1% better comes into play.  That 1% can be called a sub-goal. A subgoal is a goal that is involved in or secondary to achieving a larger goal, because the key to achieving larger goals is through small-incremental changes. This is where you will get very specific and break larger goals into smaller tangible steps. For example, if a long-term goal is to run a marathon, then a short-term goal is to run ‘x’ miles a day, ‘x’ days a week. A sub-goal then is taking that first step on each run.

Setting sub-goals enhances self-belief and satisfaction with performance because they can feel more “real” than complex, distant long-term goals. They also are more achievable! And I don’t know about you, but I am more likely to work towards something if I feel that it is attainable. Subgoals make larger goals attainable. Is it a mind trick? Maybe so, but you do what you need to do to move forward! Furthermore, you receive self-gratification with each small-incremental goal reached. As your self-belief increases, you move closer to moving mountains. Moving mountains looks like higher performance. I am telling you today -- you were meant to move mountains.  A positive cycle of increased self-belief leads to:

higher goals →  higher performance → then back to higher self-belief

Who doesn’t want to be in that cycle?

Effort: 

Unfortunately, setting goals is not a “set it & forget it” type process, like a crockpot. It takes true effort to go after a goal day after day. However, it’s more important to focus on progress rather than perfection when acting on goals. Progress builds momentum and momentum builds confidence. When you take consistent action, it shows yourself “you can” which increases self belief. Higher self belief will ultimately encourage you to go after loftier goals and so forth. Consistent effort is basically like rolling a ball down a hill. Once you give it a full go, things start rolling. 

If your effort remains consistent, then perfection doesn’t need to be a part of the equation. Wait what? Yes, read that again. If your effort remains consistent, then perfection doesn’t need to be a part of the equation. That doesn’t mean you need to figuratively climb a mountain every day to build your self belief and achieve your goals. Instead of making radical changes, just make small improvements every day that will gradually lead to the change you want. Annnnd recognize your little efforts everyday as moving towards your goal. Just because it wasn’t what you hoped to achieve today, you likely did SOMETHING to move forward. Give yourself credit for that!  Each day, focus on putting in 1% more effort than yesterday to be 1% better every day before through simple and small actions. Remember, 1%. Each day, it won’t seem like much but that 1% will start to compound before you know it. 

Persistence:

Let’s say you’re on a steady track to achieving a goal, you hit step 1 with ease, step 2 with stride and then hit a speed bump or maybe even a wall at step 3. When you are feeling pulled back, maybe it’s a sign that something is not working and needs some correction before propelling forward. Think of a bow and arrow, in order to hit a target with a bow and arrow, you need to first pull it back. You need to build up that resistance to propel that arrow forward. In fact, the harder you pull it back, the further it will go forward. It is the same when you are trying to push yourself to accomplish something, you are always going to run into resistance of some sort. When you are at the point of change, you surely are going to meet the most resistance. If you can look at the resistance as just a 'step back or a step to the side so you can go in a new direction then it may be exactly what you needed to propel you even further. BUT if you look at that step back or step to the side as a failure and let it derail you, you will not see the opportunity for growth. You will miss it. 

Sometimes you need to GO through it to GET through it. The most growth usually happens in the most uncomfortable seasons.  If you think of it as only failure and not a chance to learn and grow then it will be exactly that. If you think of failure as feedback and make reviewing a part of the process, you can tweak things along the way, and keep your focus on progress. Step back. Increase awareness. Make a change. Then you won’t waste your time feeling disappointed about not being perfect.

Here is an activity that will help you start making progress towards your goals TODAY.

Click on the word activity above, print out this worksheet, and grab a pen and paper.

Take 10-15 minutes and ask yourself what are 3 - 5 long-term goals you want to achieve in the next 6-12 months. Then break these goals down into 2-3 short-term goals. Then for each short-term goal, break them down into 3-5 sub-goals. If you’re a bit confused still about how to define a sub-goal, don’t get stuck, just think about what steps you can take each day to become just 1% better. If you are someone who consistently hits the snooze button, a sub-goal could simply be waking up to your alarm the FIRST time at least 3 days a week. Need more help? Feel free to reach out to me, I would be happy to help!